It’s time to Momscape!

What is Momscape? Why you should do it? How to do it? All the questions about Momscape are answered in this article.

What is a Momscape?

Momscape is a word I made up. Yeah, sorry! No wonder you never heard of it before. It combines two words to be expressed in one word: mothers on an escape.

Well, it’s not an actual escape because you’ll return. But to me, it felt like an escape. It’s more like the mother part of you is escaping to leave room for your other self to breathe. To reconnect.

Why to do it?

Well, I have plenty of reasons and answers. The short answer is that you need this because of how our modern life is slowly grinding our souls into tiny pieces.

Especially if you are an international mom and no one is around to babysit your child. Even if you are lucky enough that your parents and friends can help you out every now and then, so you can go out with your partner. You know very well, the night doesn’t last long. It would be easy to compare how different life was for people hundreds of years ago, but let’s not go there now.

Let’s compare how people lived in the past century. Still, it was many Moons ago, but it’s something that the majority can relate to.

I'll use my grandmother as an example. My grandmother had a lot of siblings, relatives, and, therefore, lots of aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews. They lived relatively close to each other. When my grandmother had a baby, everyone near her was there to help. Her only role was to take care of the baby.
Her sister cooked, and her nieces took the baby for a stroll. Not to mention that her mother could also be there and help because she was already retired.
My grandmother retired at the age of fifty-two.

I’m not saying that those people were easy to be around, but they definitely took the burden of the postpartum period. She, as a mother, slowly adjusted to the new circumstances. Yeah, she never really broke out of this circle of helping those who helped her, but there were fairs from spring to autumn. That means that they could go and visit different villages. If the fair was a bit far away, they had to choose who was leaving to visit the family and which sister was staying with the kids. Honestly, what was wrong with the man? Different times, I guess.

There were no vacations like in the 21st century. No last-minute deals, no all-inclusive, and no only one family package. Life was different. Nowadays, people might move a lot and change jobs. We rarely invite our friends, their families, or relatives for a trip. Too many people, too many demands, too much fuss.

I personally love that kind of trip when a group of people have to collaborate, when those people have to come to a consensus. Even deciding where to eat can take a long time. As a kid, I always just observed the way people think, the way people express themselves, and the way people misunderstand each other. It can be funny and entertaining. People unintentionally show their character. Sorry, back to the topic.

So, too much fuss, so we keep it easy. In the daily grind, people get tired. Years can pass, and you might feel you just barely survive in this world. Aren’t we supposed to enjoy our time? Isn’t living about experiencing and exploring? What to explore in the same place every day? If you go to the same work and meet the same people, you are not exploring but repeating. Doing this is nothing but a habit. Are we just working moms and dads? And that’s where my second answer or reason hit.

Who are you first?

I see myself as a human first.

Then, I take on the roles of a woman, a mother, a partner, and a teammate. These roles make up essential parts of my life, but these labels are only pieces of a larger identity. I was acting as a mother for too long. Sure, when you have a baby, your mommy brain is active, and that’s how it is supposed to be. But you need a break after a while.

I needed to revisit my core self. The human in me. What do I like to do? Where my mind wonders when I'm talking aloud. I've noticed, that it's so different when I have internal conversations and when I'm talking with someone. What’s like eating dinner without your child in your lap? What are they showing in the cinema lately? How is my partner feeling about being a father? You don’t always have to talk about the kids and their needs, but somehow, we always end up there.

A Momscape can help you connect with the woman inside you. Talk with your friend — childless or not — and plan a long weekend somewhere you always wanted to go or somewhere where you can afford it and not feel guilty about it.

I mean, guilt will come and sit on your shoulder, but don’t let guilt sit there too long. Make sure you leave your kid in good hands. Make sure the child is fine, and everything’s going to be fine.

I refused for years to leave my kids and have fun without them. When my youngest turned four, I felt I was ready to be myself more. My suggestion is if you are not comfortable with it, just wait until you are. It’s worth the wait.

During your Momscape, you won’t be a mother for too long.

Maybe while you call your kids and when you see something cute that they would love to see or have. But you will connect with things you like as a woman. Dress up pretty, put makeup on, go dance, visit museums, read a book or two, take a nap, go to the cinema, have a late-night talk with your friend, or take a long walk in the evening hours — things you usually can’t do. Hike, bike, swim, sunbath, sip a coffee, meditate, whatever you feel like.

It’s your time.

It’s the time for the woman in you.

Set yourself free!

Go, enjoy the ride!

The Witty Witch